After spending the past two days at work taking care of a lot of stuff, I have made an amazing discovery….I am NOT superwoman. And that kind of makes me a little bit sad. It shouldn’t, but, somehow, it does.
When my girls were little, they always thought that Mom could do anything. Even when she couldn’t, they thought she could. And that was not too hard to ive up to then. But that was then, and ths is now. they are grown, and I am older.
Funny how even though you look in the mirror and see the lines, and wrinkles, and gray hair, you still think of yourself as being young and looking like you did then. And you WANT to think that you can still do the same things you could do then, even when common sense (and your body) tells you differently.
I can still do most of the things I did when I was younger, but, there are a few things that are better left alone now. For instance, I have tried Zumba in the comfort of my living room, where I can rest wehn I need to…yes, I said NEED to. I can’t go constantly for an hour without stopping to rest. So, if I am going to do Zumba, it will have to be at home. I can also shop with the best of them, but now I prefer to have an idea of what I am looking for BEFORE I leave the house, instead of wandering around in stores, aimlessly, trying to figure out what to buy for a gift.
I guess that I am beginning to learn that it is okay to be a little bit slower, and to just say no to things that I can’t do, or simply don’t have the time to do. I used to think that I could do it all. And I tried to prove that to my family and friends on a daily basis. But I now realize that I can choose to be involved in things that interest me, instead of getting involved in everything that cones along, because someone suggests that I should.
I still feel like there are times when I am expected to be Superwoman. Sometimes at work, I get that impression, because I do so many different things. And, honestly, I try to do whatever is asked of me because in this day and age, jobs are hard to come by, and I need mine. I do enjoy what I do, but, like any job, it gets hectic and frustrating at times. Still, there are times when I need to learn to ask for help, or to just say, no, I can’t do that. but I doubt that I will do that. Sometimes, you have to just keep going, and doing whatever it is you need to do
I used to think that my house had to always be spotless, even with two kids, and working a full time job all day. And I tried to keep it that way. Didn’t succeed, and all it did was make me tired and on edge. Now, I pick up the clutter in the house, and keep the dishes done. I dust it once or twice a week, and do the laundry when I get a load. If we read the paper, and it gets laid on the couch, it may lay there for a day. I now know that the world won’t end if I don’t put the paper in the trash as soon as I put it down. And we built the house to LIVE in, and enjoy. So, we live in it. Yes, I want it to look nice, but, it is clean, and comfortable, and cozy. and if it is not clean enough for you, then, don’t come and visit me.
I used to think I had to be Superwoman, but I know now that all I have to be is myself. I do what I can do, and when I get tired, I quit. the biggest lesson I have learned over the years is this….whatever doesn’t get done today, will still be waiting tomorrow….or the next day. It will get done, but maybe just not today. And you know what? that is perfectly all right with me.
No, I’m not Superwoman. But, I have a husband and children that think I am super, and that is enough for me!
